Instantly the stupidity of the statement rang clear in my head, and a "Are you for REAL?"
I'm NOT saying the one who uttered it is stupid (I'm sure he is a wonderful person), but rather the 'idea' is stupid. To me it's like saying, "Only REAL Americans support war" - a sentiment I am sure certain factions of government and business would love us to believe, but which hardly encapsulates nor defines a real american. If you choose to subscribe to that kind of limiting nonsense, then by all means go right ahead. But I'd venture to say there'd be lines of men who did not match your definition, who'd be happy to take issue and prove the "REALNESS" of their manhood.
This lead me to ponder the real or authentic versus the fake and phony when it comes to men.
This is what I came up with:
This is what I came up with:
A REAL man isn't defined by what he likes, but by what he does with his energy. Not by his preferences, but by his presence. Not by his job, but by his character. Not by his muscles, but by the quality of his mind and thoughts. Not by his car, but by his choices. Not by his home, but by his honor. Not by his degree or intelligence and education, but by his integrity and intentions. Not by his money, but by his capacity to support and protect those things and people he cares for, and that includes himself.
A real man not only thinks and does, but he loves and nurtures, supports and protects. He dreams and laughs and cries(or maybe just tears up when the emotions move him to do so- when he needs that kind of release). He builds others up instead of tearing them down. He stands up for what his mind and heart thinks and feels and believes is right. He values and appreciates and is grateful for all he is and all he gets to share and receive. He expresses himself in ways that feel right and good for him. He makes mistakes and owns up to them. He apologizes when he's wrong. He tries to do his best, and help others do their best. He's not perfect, but he's got heart and spirit and soul. He creates and he builds. He contemplates things that interest him and explores them. He feels fear sometimes, but he knows that he can connect to the courage within, his well of reserve and fortitude to conquer that which frightens or tries to limit his power or the power of others. He uses his power wisely and in balance, never stealing from others. He takes risks, but of course he thinks BEFORE he acts! He knows who he is, and if he doesn't always, then he's willing to seek and learn and live and love and lose and let go and grow!
And when he's gotten too cozy, for too long on his couch or in his life, he stretches himself, and sets off to explore new fields of thought and expression, pushing his boundaries, expanding and evolving.
A Real man is the Divine Masculine Embodied, and so the strength of the man is not in his arm or leg muscles, but another more important muscle- his heart. A real man is one who is connected to the feminine energy within him, and through this connection he's tied into the energy of unconditional love and acceptance, the source of his inspiration and excellence, of the infinite potential he and his world contain- to all the magic and wonder that is possible.
If you are a man, whether you are short or tall, big or small, thin or overweight, with a head full of hair or none at all, regardless of your color, nationality, religion, sexual preference, education level, socioeconomic status, a real man exists within you. No matter how many false masks you carry with you, nor how many wounds, negativity or prejudices weigh you down, you have the ability to access this larger part of yourself should you CHOOSE to. You have the ability to shed that which limits your greatness, your power and your brilliance. To live as real as you can, you need to have all your Bodies connected: Physical, Mental, Emotional and Spiritual.
*Men or Women can do the following:
1. Get into your body- Exercise and move it! Thank it for helping you to experience the world. Apologize to it for mistreating it. Intend to take better care of it, drink more water, eat more fruits and vegetables and whole grains, good fats, probiotics, fermented foods and beverages (for better digestion). It doesn't mean you can't still eat the junk food, but do so in balance- the more live, high energy foods you consume the more alive your body will feel! Get massages or energy work. Ask your body what it wants to be healthy, and listen to it! It knows how to be healthy, to heal and regenerate itself- It is amazingly powerful, if you work with it, not against it.
2. Connect your body to the planet, pull in the earth energy (Body's bare skin contact with the earth: feet/hands on the ground, grass, sand, dirt, in lakes, oceans, streams, touching trees, plants, rocks,etc). This is really important because we are surrounded by electrical energy (technology, computers, radio waves, video games, etc), and all of that is MASCULINE ENERGY- Whether we are male or female, we NEED to BALANCE it with the FEMININE EARTH ENERGY to insure the health of our bodies.
Imbalance = DISEASE! Balance = EASE (fluid flow of energy)!
3. Connect your physical body (base of your spine) to your creative energy (sacred sex space) and your power center (belly button area). Breathe in the energy from the Universe through your nose, take it deep into your belly- circulate the energy, moving the old energy out of your space, and giving more space for the new to be born within you.
4. Now bring in your heart center (emotional space), connecting it to your lower self (belly button).
5. Connect your heart to your throat center (your power of communication, where you speak your truth from)
6. Next link your throat to your Intuitive Center (3rd eye area and your Crown- top of the head).
Your higher self contacts you through the top of your head, sending you guidance and information, and it is through your 3rd Eye area that this information is TRANSLATED. How it comes through depends on how your individual psychic gifts express themselves. And YES, you do have psychic gifts, even if you haven't yet experienced them, or are scared of the thought of that- Please don't be afraid. Just as you have unique talents and abilities, so too do you have spiritual gifts. It is these gifts which can help you maneuver more effectively through life. They are not meant to be a source of embarrassment or pain, they are part of our STRENGTHS, regardless of our sex.
Give yourself permission to explore what makes you happy, how you can use your gifts and talents and energy to add to the planet, and to the lives of others. Have fun! Laugh, Don't take yourself or life too seriously, and yet always have reverence and respect for all of life, yourself and others.
Take care with your thoughts and words- the ones you speak to others and the ones you speak to yourself (both silently and aloud).
Be YOU and all that that entails- your mind, your body, your soul (emotions) and your spirit.
Preferences shift, styles change, bodies age, but what remains is the character of the individual, the quality of your particular energetic vibration, the potent energy of the soul, the love in the heart, the laughter and joy in the being.
In reality, ANYONE who is in a masculine body is a REAL MAN, the question however is, Is he REALLY being ALL he can be? That is up to him to decide. For me, I am grateful for all the men out there, the authentic and otherwise- for I see how great they can be, and KNOW their beauty and power, and only wish that they see and know and use it too!!
And if they don't, that's okay, we REALLY do have plenty of time and space
to play
and explore
and evolve!
All my Love, Jamie Ferry
